The past week was quite hectic and confusing, my school started again on tuesday, it is my very first year at this school and oh god plenty of things already went wrong on the first day. We had an introduction on Tuesday, I didn't know anyone there which was kind of scary and exciting at the same time, I was quite early because my boyfriend had to work and he brought me to school by car. So I walked in and well found my way perfectly, I was really happy about that, they held a speech and gave some information in the gym of the school afterwards we were separated in groups to get a tour around the school, fill in some forms and stuff. They also gave us a website where to find our schedule. So I was like great, nothing's going wrong so far. I also had to make a college card, it's a student card which allows you passage trough the school, you can buy food and the teachers scan it with something to control your absence. The problem was making that fucking card, the locket was always crowded and full and busy and when it was finally my turn the fucking machine was broken, so lets try tomorrow. So at home I was checking that website for my schedule like ten thousand times but I never saw any schedule on it! Next day which would have been my first day of lessons I had no idea where to go, so I asked my schedule at the reception, I wasn't the only student who couldn't see it though, it seemed to be a technical mistake. Because all the confusion I looked on the day monday on my schedule instead of wednesday, so yes the very first day I sat in very wrong classrooms and followed very wrong lessons, I had no idea because I actually was in the classes I had to follow so I thought I was doing alright, I noticed after the lunch break that I missed two classes I had to follow.. ugh fuck really??.. so I just followed the last class on my wednesday schedule and that was the begin of my school year. The rest of the week wasn't as confusing I've got my schedule, my school webmail, my student card and now just in the run for a locker! Hectic, Busy, Confusing, A lot of work, Being poor, welcome to the student life.. & you know what?. I LOVE IT!

I have been at this place called La Place, it's a self service restaurant and they had these amazing juices over there, I've been there many times but this juice was new. It's quite easy to make at home, I'll try to make it tomorrow cause my boyfriend and I are planning a barbeque with some friends at our place. You can make it with a lot of different fruits but I'll choose strawberries, red berries, blackberries & mango, cause those fruits were in the juice I had at La Place & it tasted really good. After you put the fruits in a glass, you just put some orange juice in it and it's done! :D

These girls made the past year awesome. Thank you. <3

Last weekend the weather was great, it's late summer, all the leaves on the trees are dark green and ready to fall of soon I guess, some of them are even getting fall colors. My boyfriend is selling some cars so we drove them to the back garden and while he was taking photos of them I was kind of wandering wondering around the space when I discovered a group of wild apple trees in the garden, I was super excited about it! My boyfriend even didn't know they had apple trees in their garden which was kind of funny hehe! At my grand mothers house there also used to be apple trees and lots of other fruit trees, so it reminded me a lot of my youth, I picked an apple and it tasted as good as my memories of my time at my grandmothers place, where I used to run around, play with the animals, pick all sorts of fruits.. when everything was just alright. Later that day we took the dog and went to the forrest for a walk, there we too discovered wild blackberries, we didn't pick those but the dog did, at first we thought that his tongue was bleeding but then we noticed that he was eating the blackberries which was really funny, after my mother made homemade pizza and we went to eat at my place.. was such a cosy summer day!

That bird still can't fly very well, But someday she will know the feeling of cutting through the wind. The place she can't reach is still there in the distance, She gazes at it, keeping her wish to herself..

May we always remember, The yesterdays left behind by the seasons.

-Tien

Being friends with you has added a bright spot to my life.

This used to be my favorite song, haven't listened it for a while but it brings back memories, it's funny how many thoughts can be attached to one song.

You mixed me up for someone Who'd fall apart without you Yeah you broke my heart for the first time But I'll get over that too It's hard to find the reasons Who can see the rhyme? I guess we were seasons out of time I guess you didn't know me

If you think love is blind? That I wouldn't see the flaws between the lines Surprise, and I caught you out On every single time that you lied Did you think that every time I see you I would cry No not me, not I, not I, no not me, not I

The story goes on without you And there's got to be another ending But yeah you broke my heart it won't be the last time But I'll get over them too As a new door opens we close the ones behind And if you search your soul I know you'll find You never really knew me

All you said to me All you promised me All the mystery never did believe No I never cry no I never not me not I

If you think love is blind That I wouldn't see the flaws between the lines Surprise, and I caught you out On every single time that you lied Did you think that every time I see you I would cry No not I, I won't cry No not me, not I, not I, Not I No not me, not I

Ever thought that your life is just going nowhere, that you're living that stupid routine without getting any further? It's what I used to think, I had a crappy job, bills to pay & no real destination. I have been doubting, analyzing, thinking, crying, I have been desperate about this thing called life. During my kind of absence on my blog, I tried to post something now and then but it never were really things that were useful or interesting, so during my absence I kind of was spending time with my boyfriend, figuring out what the point was of my life, figuring out who the hell I was.. the only thing I knew was that I was more than a name. I have made a lot of changes, mistakes, regrets but I also have had the most amazing and beautiful year in my life so far. I learnt how to depend on myself, how not let people walk over you, how to have a big mouth and to do and say whatever I want, I have learnt how to laugh, how to be funny, how to make friends, I have learnt a bunch of things I did not know before. Now I am quitting my crappy fucked up job to go back to school as a stronger and more committed person than I ever have been before. I know who I am, I know what I want, I used to think that I was too old for everything now.. but I am not, life is about learning about living about being free. Society is about working, paying bills, breaking you down and when you're broken, to crush you even further, well fuck that. Now I'm choosing freedom, now I'm choosing myself, I'm choosing my choices. Maybe times get hard sometimes but hard times make you harder as well. Love Tien.